Author: katie

Romantic. New Hampshire native. Boston Globe enthusiast. Go Gamecocks.
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halloween candy.

bring it on.
bring it on.

Okay, it’s official- I’m totally drinking the fall Kool-Aid.  All this fall talk got me thinking about other things I loved as a kid during this time of year, but I will stick to really, really important topics for the purpose of this post: Halloween and the candy situation.

I don’t care who you are or where you grew up; Halloween for kids is a big deal, visiting the Halloween Store every year is a fantastic experience. Candy is an even bigger deal.  Aside from all the unhealthy facts and findings the fitness experts of the world want to spoil you with, candy is awesome all the time, but when you are a kid- it’s like currency and happiness combined in one little bright and colorful package.  It was a festival of awesomeness for me.

Side note: Halloween was NOT the festival of awesomeness in the third grade. My first pet, Blanche, died while I was trick-or-treating with my friends. (Courtney, if you read this, there is no need to comment on the details of this event) I digress…

Anyway, I remember “beggars night” clear as day. I would dress up as whatever princess, Cabbage Patch Kid, cat, or bunny that I decided upon for the moment. With pillow case in hand, dad on site with his pick-up truck (we would ride from street to street in the bed of it), and strategy for the houses planned out- we were off, a-candy-hunting-we-would-go!

The difference in the aforementioned candy houses are easy to describe:

Type 1: Typical lollipop basket, Whoppers, M&Ms, Tootsie-Rolls, Smartees, Nestle Crunch bars, Starburst and Skittles are your usual give-a-ways. We appreciate you because you add to the collection, but you are not my favorite house.

Type 2: The jerks or the house that usually gets the “seriously? come on!” response. You know what’s there: raisins, Good-N-Plenty, apples, popcorn balls, mini toothbrushes, and toothpaste, and Raisinettes are in your basket. We typically are warned of your presence on the block and avoid you at all costs.  Then, through a strong use of WOM we carry-on the message. You do not deserve to have your light on.  Traitors.

Type 3: The trusting house. Sure…leave your basket of goodies on the porch with a note that says “please take only one.” We’ll listen.  Actually, this one is funny. A colleague of mine was speaking how his father was so patient, that he would dress up as a scarecrow and actually sit on the porch with said sign, holding the bowl of candy. As the kids would dare take more than one, he would warn them of the rules, thus scaring the shit out of the dishonest child. Cruel, but funny as hell.

Type 4: The COOL house. You have Reese’s, Twix, Milk Duds, and Snickers. We love you.

Type 5: The rich house. You have full size candy bars. Can we live with you year round?

*NEW* updated 10/14 Type 6: The haunted yard! I can’t believe I forgot about this little gem of a family. I KNOW you remember this house.  This family went above and beyond the call of duty by creating an experience before you receive your treats! Fake grave stones, skeletons, creepy themed music, spider webs, etc. As a kid this house scares the ever loving shit out of you, but as you grow, you see that it’s not so bad.  What is bad at every age? The person who jumps out and yells “BOO!” before you get to the house. This house better always have Reese’s.

Am I missing any?

When I would get home with my friends, we would sit in my basement (it was the TV room), turn on whatever scary movie (I don’t know why Elvira is popping into my head, but she is) was on TV and then go for it.

i recall this lady introducing every scary movie of my youth. so wrong.
i recall this lady introducing every scary movie of my youth. so wrong.

Business time: Candy was now emptied on the ground for organization, inventory and trade.  I took this VERY seriously. Reese’s and Snickers obviously got the most stock value, along with the full size (that usually were not in the pot for trade, as that was like gold), then down from there- the items from the bad house (if I partook) were usually tossed aside and then eventually thrown away, if not pawned off on my father.  I remember my parents would pretend they were looking for razor blades or poison, which usually just meant they wanted some and, as a parental rule, didn’t have to ask first. 

Last year was the first time I lived in a neighborhood (vs. a city) and was able to pass out candy.  I was so excited, but honestly, kinda nervous.  Would I do it right? Thankfully, Brad guided me through this process, and it went off brilliantly.  What would I do without him?  Actually, let’s be honest, being a skilled ex-trick-or-treater, I probably would have handled it just fine, but it was more fun with him. Then again, what isn’t?  🙂

happy friday!
happy friday!
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time travel thursday.

Okay, so I don’t have an ongoing theme for any particular day of the week, but the title seemed to fit what I wanted to write about, so I am sticking with it. Work with me on this one. Welcome to #timetravelthursday.

I work about an hour from where I live in Maine. I drive everyday up I-95, passing nothing, but trees, for most of the journey. Well, as luck would have it, it’s fall in New England. I don’t know that I remember paying attention as much as I do now, but damn; I have never seen such natural vivid colors in all my life. The trees are the brightest reds, oranges and yellows I can remember.  I tried taking a picture, but my iPhone didn’t do it justice, so I used Google for this post. Anyway (I’ll get to the point)- all these leaves reminded me of something from my youth: field trip day.

now imagine a highway straight up the middle.
now imagine a highway straight up the middle.

Close your eyes and remember this with me, as it was an awesome trip down memory lane this morning. You remember those days: It’s back to school. You have new clothes, new school supplies, new shoes, new haircut, and that feeling of “it’s a whole new year” ambition. Can’t you smell fall in the air? I realize some people had different experiences of this, but this was mine. 

my mother use to sing to me "school days, school days, deal oh golden rule days..." to get me out of bed in the morning. best alarm clock i've ever known to date.
my mother use to sing to me “school days, school days, dear oh golden rule days…” to get me out of bed in the morning. best alarm clock i’ve ever known to date.

Well, having been raised in New Hampshire, fall is something we NHites have come to look forward to, as do the school districts to find the best schools, and the playgrounds they have which sometimes are great thanks to equipment from https://school-playground-equipment.uk/. Whether it’s apple picking, visiting a local farm, or going for some sort of a nature hike up the White Mountains– we visited it at some point.

Remember? Your mom packs you a lunch. You’re excited to be able to bring a brown paper bag lunch vs. eating the gruel in the cafe. Mine was usually PB&J  (that will end up smooshed), an apple, Fritos in a little plastic baggie (not the cool ones with the zip-lock, the ones that you tuck into itself that usually opens), chicken noodle soup in a thermos (whatever happened to those?) that would stay warm all day, and a Twix bar.  Side note: I often forget how much I love Twix until I see them. I remember when peanut butter Twix came out it was a revelation, but then a super problem because I could never decide which one I wanted more- and I wasn’t allowed to have both! Oh, how I LOVED Twix.

i still can't decide to this day!
i still can’t decide to this day!

Once you’re at school- you don’t have to actually go in school, which was awesome.  School buses would be lined up out front. There was usually a list telling you which bus you would be on- which would be your group for the day. In this group you would either be without your friends, or with them in an odd number. The odd number is important to remember because it would mean that someone would be without a “buddy” or someone to sit with on the bus. On top of that- WHERE you sat on the bus was just as important as who was next to you. I look back now and recall the sheer panic I would feel, as I was looking for my best friend and a seat in the back of the bus. I guess it helped strengthen my independence, but GOSH did it suck at the time.  I could talk about as I got older, when boys and bullies were a factor, but I will keep it innocent.

i'm thankful we didn't have social media.
i’m thankful we didn’t have social media. could you imagine how much worse this experience would have been for us?

the feeling of relief when you find a place to sit.

Once you were on the bus your journey began. Sometimes there were parents on board, but mostly it was just your teachers and the bus driver. A half hour drive felt like a lifetime- and it didn’t really matter where you were going, the excitement of going somewhere was enough to make a little girl smile.

Do you miss those days of new and unknown? What was your favorite field trip?

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tidesmarticles

My agency created a new blog called TideSmarticles. It’s a play on words with the company name + articles.  Get it? We like it.  Anyway, I wrote one of our first posts and I thought I would share. Mild brag: I not only won this business for the agency, but I was the account lead on the event I am about to describe! We have a full schedule of events for many of their labels for 2014, but this first event for The Seeker Wines was the kickoff to a beautiful relationship.

How Experiential Marketing Made A Simple Tasting Event An Event They’d Never Forget

Recently EMG3 was posed with the task of assisting our new client, The Seeker Wines of Kobrand Corporation, with an event they were previously scheduled to attend: The Aspen Food and Wine Festival.

Seeker Food Wine Marketing

Usually what happens at events of this nature: The participating brands will set up a table, within a tent.  Attendees of the event will stand in a line to sample a taste, then move on to the next. Done and done.

The Seeker Wines wanted to increase their presence within the event, aside from the tasting table.  Their goal was to build brand recognition, but potentially grow their customer base within the small Colorado city– and overall make the most of the weekend marketing dollars.  Larger advertising options were presented, such as branding the Silver Queen Gondola to the top of Aspen Mountain, but didn’t seem like a fit for the desired goal.  EMG3 was eager to the task.

Seeker Food Wine MarketingOur solution: hire a team of brand ambassadors to spread the fun and worldly experience of The Seeker Wines all over the city outside of the event.  The Seeker Wines have done an amazing job of building their brand’s identity with Steampunk décor, so we used this to our advantage within the costuming and event set elements. The “Seekers” saturated the market place with sweepstakes contest entries and free glasses of wine. Word of mouth spread quickly about the “Seekers” and soon they were the talk of the town, with increased popularity and brand recognition.  The “experience” also increased the distribution of the brand in many local establishments.

Overall the experience was one Aspen, the patrons, and The Seeker Wines would never forget!  (See for yourself) The Seeker Aspen (video)

How could your brand increase its presence and brand recognition with an experience?

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it’s about that time of year, and i can’t stop smiling.

the carolinas.
the carolinas.

I don’t want to jinx my college football team, as I believe every major sports media outlet might have already, but I am a day away from kicking off college football season. I am also a day away from my family vacation to Sanibel Island.  I feel like my head is about to explode with too much stimulation, but I’ll take it.

The hype: The Freak

The reality: South Carolina Football 2013

I have actually been reading the “match-up” reviews, and looks like North Carolina is expected to upset the people of William Brice Stadium tomorrow evening. I don’t know what I think will happen. Although, I am not happy that Shaw keeps hurting himself.  Brad likes Thomson better, but I don’t know if either will lead the offense like they need to, in order to pull off the win. I miss the days of Lattimore, Garcia, Jeffrey, Sanders, Gilmore, and Ingram. Gosh they were fun to watch together (even more fun when Clowney entered the scene).  All eyes look to Clowney, but is he enough? Let’s hope! Let’s hope this young team pulls it together and has the confidence to understand what a great ball club and coach they have the privilege of representing. Oh, and a win would be really cool, too.

My blood bleeds Garnet & Black- and I seriously feel bad for the people who will be on my flight tomorrow.  Oh- did I forget to mention that I will be watching the first hour of this from 30,000 feet?

my sports bar of the friendly skies.
my five points of the friendly skies.

I have downloaded the necessary iPhone app in order to guarantee my front row seat. I have pre-ordered my 24 hour Delta WiFi pass. I have even emailed Delta- at the small chance I get a newer plane with a real TV in the seat.  I’m not taking any chances on missing this game.  Our layover is in Atlanta.  Don’t worry- I have already mapped out the closest restaurant to our gate. I just hope the other people on my flight don’t mind that I channel Carl Lewis on exiting the plane. It’s not personal, it’s Carolina football.

“We Hail Thee Carolina”

We hail thee, Carolina, and sing thy high praise
With loyal devotion, remembering the days
When proudly we sought thee, thy children to be:
Here’s a health, Carolina, forever to thee!

Since pilgrims of learning, we entered thy walls
And found dearest comrades in thy classic halls
We’ve honored and loved thee as sons faithfully;
Here’s a health, Carolina, forever to thee!

Generations of sons have rejoiced to proclaim
Thy watchword of service, thy beauty and fame;
For ages to come shall their rallying cry be:
Here’s a health, Carolina, forever to thee!

Fair shrine of high honor and truth, thou shalt still
Blaze forth as a beacon, thy mission fulfill,
And crowned by all hearts in a new jubilee:
Here’s a health, Carolina, forever to thee!

Once the game has concluded, we will be on a much needed and deserved vacation for the Labor Day weekend. There will be shelling, laughs, gator hunting, relaxing, reading and sun. Nothing else matters for the next 5 days.

It’s hard to say which one I am looking forward to more, but it’s safe to say- as much as I love my Gamecocks, I can’t wait to spend some quality time with the boys on a beach.  Sorry, Sir Big Spur.

my beautiful little pissed off chicken.
my beautiful little pissed off chicken.

Now, just don’t break my heart tomorrow night. 🙂

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family.

“fam·i·ly /ˈfam(É™)lÄ“/ Noun. A group consisting of parents and children living together in a household.”

Family is a funny thing, isn’t it? This post might be a little bit touchy, but I never write anything touchy, so why not? I think in terms of traditional family, especially from the era, which I was accustomed, you think of a family as the mother, father and kids. Maybe a dog or cat- even a fish. Who defines family? I know what I have seen, what I believe, and what I have experienced. I’ll share.

I have seen families where there was the single mother, who refused to remarry after a divorce, who seemed to marry the life of her kids (no matter how involved she wanted to be). She controlled the “family” with use of her (tons of inherited) money, guilt and good old-fashioned yelling and judgment. I know she made fun of me on a regular occurrence, but I also understood she couldn’t help herself. Being that lonely must suck. It’s certainly been one of the more entertaining family situations I have seen: The brother who can do no wrong, the other brother who can do no right and the spoiled princess sister who sits on a pedestal. I won’t mention the odd Oedipal instances, but they were present. CREEPY AS HELL AT TIMES, but present nonetheless.

Side note: If only the mother knew how much I know. Oh, and I don’t understand why she used to follow my Twitter feed and mock me, but I know about that too- and you really have to be bored to look at my Twitter feed. I mock my own Twitter feed! It’s social media, not rocket science! I digress.

I have seen the perfect family. Wife, husband and years of faithful and loving marital bliss. Three successful happy daughters, one of who happens to be my best friend, who now have grown into healthy adults with amazing families of their own. I love this family and wish everyone had the luck, love and happiness they do.

I have seen family with a famous relative(s). The family who has coped (or not coped, rather) with loss. The stage family. The active family. The poor family. The military family. The family with a parent who is a drunk (or smoked something that didn’t smell quite right, but being I was a little girl- I didn’t know it probably was an illegal plant). The family that yelled and fought. The super happy and fun family that always had the cool stuff to play with. The super-rich family. The divorced family. The non-traditional family. The southern family. You name it, and I have probably seen it. Regardless of the situation, it will never compare to the strangeness I have encountered, and the resolution that came out of it.

My sister passed away 4 years ago. It was something out of our control (she had addiction issues, which led to her murder in New Orleans. I am the only one in the family who is honest about it and has no problem talking about it, as it is the truth), but the thing I have always found funny is that since it happened- no one in my family talks about it, her life, or anything relating to her. I mean that seriously. Unless someone is crying about it, there is nothing. I bring up a “fun” time, like our pillow fight tournaments (which were epic and I think I won, once), etc and it is dropped as “too hurtful of a topic.” I don’t get it. Shit, I hope I don’t die! I wouldn’t ever want my memory lost with my heartbeat. Aren’t you supposed to talk about the happy times? Not to mention since she died, everyone has changed. My mom is an insane person now, who treats me like a redheaded step child (and speaking as a woman who has a history of being obsessed with pink flamingos, that is hard to beat). I have not spoken to her in almost a month and she has not called me ONCE to find out why. I find this astounding. At this point, it is pretty clear why I am not speaking to her: Family doesn’t act like this.

Members of my family blow my mind. Just to be clear, what I am about to describe isn’t just how I am treated; many people in the “family” treat everyone this way. In my opinion, (I’ll say it again) Family DOESN’T act like this! Family isn’t jealous and angry and picking fights and writing mean emails all the time. Family doesn’t cut people out for making mistakes and blaming and pointing fingers. Family doesn’t hold grudges! It’s insane the amount of drama that can be within one family. A family should TALK! The one thing I can say though: it truly is fantastic to be able to stand on the outside, looking in, and have nothing to do with any of it. I have removed myself from it all- and I have never been healthier in all my life.

Disclaimer:There are very cool members of my extended family who do not fit any of the above description, and they know who they are. To them: I love you!

The one positive change since my sister died is that I am now close with my father, who doesn’t treat anyone poorly. He is simple guy, with no demands or expectations. Jennifer (my sister’s name- and for some reason I feel like I am saying Voldermort’s name when I type it just now) was very close with my father. Because of that I never got to know him- aside from random singular visits when I lived in South Carolina, Boston and Chicago. My dad comes for breakfast almost every weekend. I make pancakes and he talks about boy things with Brad and Gunnar. He even let Brad take his Harley for a spin the other day (gasp!). Please note- THIS DOESN’T EVER HAPPEN! My father never let us walk near his toys growing up, never mind drive one! Regardless, I’m getting to know my father better and I think that is very cool.

I have some step-ish siblings, but in the 20 years that they have been in my life- they have always had their own thing going on, and I am no one to intrude. Would it be cool if we had more of a relationship? Sure. Will I fight it? Probably not.

My family is my Brad, Gunnar, Lucy (pup) and Buddy (pup). We have a beautiful home. We all get along. We don’t have fights or complain about each other. We don’t talk behind each other’s backs (although, it would be kinda funny if one of our dogs talked about us behind our backs). We make decisions as a family. When we do have an issue, we talk it out. Most of all, we love and respect each other. Coming up in 2 weeks, we have a family trip (sans pups) planned to Sanibel Island. I’m very much looking forward to it!

One last little sweet note: Brad made me a wine rack for our home! It’s made from walnut and cherry wood! It goes perfectly with out new living room furniture!

he imagined, he drew, he created.
he imagined, he drew, he created.

Someone said to me recently that Brad and Gunnar were not my family because “we are not married yet.” Well, I don’t know about you, but aside from the amazing friends I have had along the way- it’s the perfect family for me. After all, it’s mine.

 

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when in doubt: consult with laura.

Okay, so since my horrible dining experience, it has been a while since something struck my fancy enough to post about- until today.

I’ll explain.

On my way to work this morning, I had an inkling that I was supposed to attend traffic court today for a speeding ticket I was given back in January of this year. I was “positive” the time was 1pm, so I went to work as usual for 8:30 am.

Well, that eerie little feeling in my stomach (I guess it was more my head because that would be strange if my stomach was talking to me) told me it might be in the morning.

So, I waited until the court house was open (8am) and called to ask. I didn’t get through to a human until about 16 minutes later.

(8:16am) me: Hi! I think I have court today, but have no idea what time it is for, do you mind checking? My name is Katherine Schmidt.

lady who answered the phone: “Katherine Schmidt? Please hold. Yes, I see your name on the list for 8:30 am.”

me: Um. I’m in Scarborough at this point (40 minutes from the courthouse) can you tell them I am running late, or like bump me to the next time? Or does it not work like that?

lady: (in an extremely opposite tone to my upbeat demeanor) Doesn’t work like that. Do your best to get here.

I ran through the door at exactly 8:45.

Yes, I understand I sped to get to traffic court on time for a speeding ticket, but it was necessary and not ironic at all. They had not called my name yet.  phew.  I will note- to the rather large guy who made the “great timing” sarcastic comment as I was standing in the hallway- mind your own business. I digress.

Back story: I started working in Maine while still living in NH, so the hour and a half drive was killing me. I decided to up my MPH to 85-90 and cut the drive by 30 minutes. I had not received a speeding ticket since I was 20 years old, so it never occurred to me that it was possible. I mean, I’m driving to work- not trying to break the law. Well, I got one. Then another one a week later.  SERIOUSLY?! I decided to slow down, and seek guidance from my brilliant lawyer friend in DC, who HAPPENED to work with traffic related issues. Can’t hurt to see legal counsel, right? Laura (my brilliant lawyer friend) proceeded to construct a letter for me to mail to the state of Maine, defending my case. What I received back in my email inbox was nothing short of Pulitzer Prize winning legal jargon! I immediately put it on my letterhead, and with and stamp and a smile it was in the mail! Ho-ray! I would be saved from the land of increased insurance and silly points on my license!

Fast forward to today. When they called my name, I was to meet with the citing officer. I walked over and immediately remembered how nice he was when he first pulled me over.  Well, as he was reviewing the ticket I see paperwork attached to my name. I scanned the materials in his hand- until I saw it. The letter. OMG. He has it. I froze. He was reviewing it with a huge smile on his face. When he was complete he gives me a look and says, “What would you like me to do?” I told him I would gladly pay the fine, as long as my record could stay clean. He agreed (as long as I don’t speed for 6 months). Success! I immediately want to call Laura at this point and express my love for her.

So, as I am waiting to get my final paperwork, I look up. The officer is reading the letter again off in a corner. Smiling. I’m telling you- it was an AWESOME letter. I mean I didn’t even understand half of it to be honest. 🙂

You want to see the letter, don’t you? Okay, okay- and you’re welcome.

January 4, 2013

To the Great State of Maine:
Please accept this letter as a proclamation of my protest to the moving violation citation #XXXXXX issued to me on the morning of Friday, January 4, 2013. Setting aside issues of appropriate calibration of the speed detection device used by the citing office, I believe the illustrious and exalted State of Maine should release me from liability associated with the alleged violation of exceeding the posted speed limit on the basis that (i) I was operating my vehicle during rush hour traffic at the rate of speed considered by leading researchers to be optimal for improved highway safety and (ii) I have no history of prior moving violations.

First, Dr. Stephen Johnson of the University of Arkansas Transportation Research Center is the nation’s leading research expert on highway safety, particularly in the area of speed differentials. Dr. Johnson’s research indicates that the vehicle interaction rate (aka accidents) increases by 227% for every 10 miles per hour speed differential present on rural highways. Allegedly, (again I am phrasing this in the hypothetical as I do not accept that the citing officer had a properly functioning and calibrated speed detection device) my vehicle was traveling 14 miles per hour above the posted speed limit. Considering this was during heavy rush hour traffic, I was simply operating my vehicle at the rate of speed which was the safest for the conditions at that moment and that was with the flow of traffic. Should I have slowed the vehicle down to the rate of speed where the officers would have registered compliance with the posted rate of speed, my chances of being involved in an accident would have exceeded 227%. Surely, the State of Maine has a history of making exceptions for law violations where common sense are safety are so obvious to reasonably minded folk that it far exceeds the impetus of the underlying law so much so that compliance with the underlying law becomes nonsensical and in fact jeopardizes our collective well-being. For example, do we support the issuing of citations during a blizzard where the motor vehicle operator has slowed the vehicle far below the minimum speed compliance rules? Certainly not. The State recognizes that conditions demand safety to surmount predetermined speed limitations which are designed to be in operation during usual conditions. On the morning of January 4th, I respectfully submit to you that I was simply operating my vehicle under conditions that any reasonable person would have deemed to be the safest which was the rate of speed with the rest of the heavy flow of traffic.

Secondarily, the State must consider my stellar driving record while operating within its boundaries. As a frequent, if not daily, traveler of the great state for nearly seventeen years, I am immensely proud of my prior safety record, which fails to include not only any history of moving violations, but any trace of criminal activity whatsoever. Surely, upstanding citizens with such a dedication to safety, so much so that they are willing to read and cite leading research from one of the most reputable transportation research centers in the world, should be encouraged to continue to travel on the States highways and not discouraged. If I may be so bold I am, in fact, the sort of safe operator the State wishes to embrace. Therefore, should the State wish to not outright dismiss the citation, I would suggest that we reduce the violation to a warning so that I may reflect upon this as a learning experience and we may all move forward safely.

I would also like to note that the ticket issuing officer was very professional and kind-hearted about the ticket and alerting me to the safety of the cold and its effects on the roads.  I was appreciative and, in return, I would hope the State would provide him with a properly functioning radar gun. It is a shame to have such a nice fellow be continuously wrong on how fast vehicles are traveling.
Thank you and Happy New Year!

Katherine Dawn Schmidt

My advice to anyone reading this that gets a speeding ticket: fight it with facts, wit and have an attorney (you know, if Laura is unavailable) construct it for you. A smile won’t get you everywhere (trust me, I tried that first), but a brilliant retort just might.

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well vodka, light on the bread.

It would be a complete disservice to those in the greater Seacoast NH area if I didn’t write about my dining experience last night.

It was bad.

Really bad.

In the off-chance you were craving a change of scenery for a dinner spot, I would strongly I encourage you not to make that modification with an establishment called Spaghetti Stain.

The time was 7:50 pm

(play the below video before you move on)

Brad and I were in Dover, waiting for his son Gunnar to finish his responsibilities at a school function. I had heard there might be some cute new places, so we took the grand tour of Dover and looked around. Nothing seemed different, so we walked over to Blue Latitudes. I love this restaurant for the food and because whenever Courtney is in town, it’s where we meet. Apparently, UNH graduation is this weekend, so tables were not happening for an hour. Ugh. I hate waiting. We left and decided to walk around. Side note: If I had my family in town for graduation, I would have taken them to Portsmouth. That’s just me, but then again I didn’t attend UNH. I digress.

The name should have told me to stay away. Spaghetti Stain. I wonder how many bottles of wine were involved in that decision? They had to be wasted when they signed the paperwork agreeing to it. Maybe a lost bet? Regardless, the name sucks. In fact, we tried to go to a couple other places BEFORE going back. It appeared our only option.

i saw no spaghetti.
i saw no spaghetti.

RED FLAG #1. This was the only place without a line. Nice setting. Clean pretty decor. Open room. Cool. This might work.

RED FLAG #2. Upon entering, I’m not joking, the waitresses had a fearful look on their faces. They motioned us to one of those side bars that isn’t on the bar, but against the wall, taking away any chance at leg room. Most people this would bother, but Brad and I actually enjoy sitting close, so it was okay.

comfy.
comfy.

At this point I watched an interaction where one waitress looked at us and walked away. Another looked and then looked down. Then a third said (I could see her mouth) “have they been given menus?” This went on for a couple of minutes before one of them drew the short straw and walked over.

RED FLAG #3. Upon giving us menus, the waitress opened dialogue with a hand-written note, crumbled from her pocket. On this note was a list of everything we could not order. Let me see if I can remember funny parts from it: “We don’t have the shrimp that goes in the basket, but we do have the shrimp that goes in the [entree].” I don’t get it. So you have shrimp, but these particular ones were not allowed in a basket…or are you telling me that the frozen shrimp you deep fry is unavailable and you won’t use the fresh (or frozen and just not prebreaded) version? Keep in mind I am allergic to shrimp, this interior monologue was for entertainment only. My favorite thing they were out of was blue cheese dressing. I hate blue cheese dressing, but if everything you have is store-bought anyway, can’t you run down to the grocery store? I don’t get it. Brad and I had smiles on our faces at this point, but we simply ordered our drinks and excused the waitress. The list was very long, needless to say. Apparently they were rearranging their menu– on a Friday night.

RED FLAG #4. 20 minutes later we got our drinks (for mere amusement, we actually starting timing everything with my watch). I’m not joking or exaggerating. This was another instance where I watched the waitresses across the bar do the “have they got their…” routine. Fantastic. OH and we got “well” vodka. Awesome. I said to Brad, “prepare to have a hangover tomorrow.”

RED FLAG #5. When we finally were given our drinks, as the waitress was about to drop them and run, I gave a “we’d like to order now.” The look on her face was priceless. In fact, trying to describe it with words wouldn’t do it justice, but I can tell you what she said: “You do realize that it will take a LONG time for you to get your food, right?” I asked how long. She replied, “Well. 30 minutes.” We had until 9:30, and we were enjoying each other’s company, so we ordered and took a chance. The waitress actually sighed and gave a worrisome “okay” before walking away.

RED FLAG #6. The bread. This might be my favorite part. As I was looking around, I noticed that tables all had bread on them. I flagged the waitress down and asked if we could have some too. “I was just going to ask you that question” was her response. I was actually thinking things might pick up. I excused myself to the lavatory only to come back and find Brad eating a piece of bread. I looked in the basked and saw two more, very small, pieces. “Is that you second piece?” “Nope, they brought three pieces.” “They brought three pieces for two people?” “Yep.” Three pieces and a ramekin filled with butter. Interesting. We both smiled as we split the third piece to share.

RED FLAG #7. The waitress walked over to see if we wanted another drink. I asked about the food. “Well, we were really busy tonight with that ONE table in the back.” I paused. One table. In my SWEETEST voice (if you know me you can hear me saying this) “But it’s a restaurant. And. Well. It’s dinnertime.” She just looked at me. Brad was so funny, watching and being patient, while I know he was thankful I spoke up. Brad did say at this point, “but the tables have cleared, there should be no problem now getting our food.” She then went on to tell us she would check on it. Brad has a way of saying what should have been said, after the person it should have been said to walks away. Trust me, it’s better that way. I watched them make our drinks, run out of well vodka, and switch to Absolut mid pour.

Side note: I realize at this point you might think we are being annoying or troublesome, or high maintenance, but there were about 6 groups of people around us in the same situation. We just spoke up. A man behind us, who we were watching, had a face that got redder by the moment. We actually thought his head was going to explode he looked so angry.

The woman walked back to us to say it would be 15 more minutes. We had had enough. We politely asked for the check and decided anything would be better than this. As it was, we only had 20 minutes before we had to pick up Gunnar from school. I’m beyond starving at this point.

The bill? $45. 9:10 pm

As we stood to leave, Brad walked over to the red-faced man’s table. “I guess this is where you come when you are on a diet!” The man responded, “we thought you were relatives or something with the service you were getting.” Apparently, he was sitting at the bar for 45 minutes and was completely ignored. He moved to a table and was waiting another hour- and they STILL had not taken his order. The table behind red-face sat a family. A girl shouted out “It took us 2 hours!” Unbelievable.

It might seem crass to openly express the horrible service, in the place where the horrible service is being provided, but it seemed to unit us as people, which is always fun. Agreeing on a complaint, or a good “USA! USA!” cheer always brings people together.

And for that, we thank you. -Tosh.0

Posted on

maine.

It’s official. I now live and work in the state of Maine. Given the tax-free nature of NH, I’m surprised even myself that I decided to make the jump, but now that I am here- I’m glad I did it.

This marks a few milestones for me at this venture in my short life.

  1. It’s the sixth state I have ever lived in,
  2. It’s my first grown-up-looking-and-feeling house
  3. Not to be ignored, it is also my first HOUSE in general
  4. How about a shorter commute to work (47 miles vs. 73)? Okay, that too!
  5. Feeling salty? This new abode is a shorter trek to the beach (2.5 miles)
  6. Lastly, it’s my second official residence with my Brad

As I pulled out of my driveway this morning, I could smell the ocean.

I don’t think it gets better than this- unless a brownstone in Boston with cathedral ceilings somehow crosses my path.

the house. cape neddick, maine.
the house. cape neddick, maine.

fun fact about maine: maine is the only state in the United States whose name has one syllable. neat.
fun fact about maine: maine is the only state in the united states whose name has one syllable. neat.

fun fact about maine: the honeybee is the official state insect. bzzzzz
fun fact about maine: the honeybee is the official state insect. bzzzzz

fun fact about maine: eastport is the most eastern city in the united states. the city is considered the first place in the united states to receive the rays of the morning sun. obviously.
fun fact about maine: maine is the most eastern state in the united states. the city is considered the first place in the united states to receive the rays of the morning sun. obviously.

fun fact about maine: 90% of the country's toothpick supply is produced in maine. I will live longer knowing that information.
fun fact about maine: 90% of the country’s toothpick supply is produced in maine. I will live longer knowing that information.

Bragging aside (as you know my love of a good bragger), I’m going to share another secret recipe. I have no idea why I have been giving so many recipes lately, but I feel you all like them. Why? Also, MAINE-ly (see how I did that?) because it is the first thing I baked in my new kitchen! Caveat: this is not one of the “super healthy” ones.

It was my SVP‘s birthday on Cinco de Mayo, and I thought I would bring some of my baked-goodness into the wonderful world of TideSmart Global for Monday morning. I was going to go with a bundt cake, but I felt that Gunnar and Brad should be able to taste-test, so I went with cupcakes.  In the spirit of kissing ass in a new position, I inquired the SVP’s favorite.

Vanilla with chocolate frosting. Done and done.

My grandmother Lois was the founding artist of this recipe, but it has been tweaked over the years. The best part of what I am about to explain to you? You can create this melt-in-your-mouth-goodness with ANY flavor.

Grocery list: flavor of choice cake in a boxed mix (chocolate, carrot, devil’s food, vanilla, red velvet, etc), corresponding flavor instant pudding mix (so if you buy chocolate cake, get chocolate pudding, for red velvet- I suggest dark chocolate if available and carrot, go with vanilla), frosting flavor of your choice, PURE vanilla extract, REAL butter in sticks, and eggs.

For that little bit of extra goodies, I always add white/dark/milk/chocolate or butterscotch chips.

Basically you follow the directions on the box, adding the powdered (not prepared) pudding mix, a healthy pour of vanilla extract (I find it cuts the battery/egg flavor), subbing butter for the oil portion, and only 2 eggs. Some boxes will ask for 3.  You don’t ever need 3 eggs. I don’t know why it went to 3, but don’t listen to them. For the topic of the office-birthday cupcakes, I added white chocolate chips as well. Don’t forget to let them cool for a while before you add the frosting (you don’t want the melted mess of frosting everywhere).

Aside from a colleague spoiling the surprise in the Monday morning meeting (by announcing that cupcakes were in the building), the cupcakes went over without a hitch and were inhaled by each member of the TSG team with the joy of anyone who is eating a cupcake made from a recipe inspired by a grandmother.

enjoy.
enjoy.

I wonder what I will make next.

Posted on

cacao.

I decided to bite the bullet and invest in some better workout clothing.  I won’t mention that it was randomly hailing in Maine, in April, or that the cobblestone streets in the Old Port are a pain in the ass on my tires, but I will mention how awkward the experience was for me.  First, this was what greeted me as I stood in said hail:

i don't believe your use of "namaste" in this instance.
i don’t believe your use of “namaste” in this instance.

I waited 20 minutes for the damn store to open.  Side note: They are only open from 11-5pm.  How the hell do they get a lunch break too?? The work ethic here is outstanding.  After spending the quickest $90 of my life on a shirt and sports bra, and being treated like an outsider by the lemmings in the lululemon, I was on my way.  When I told Brad how the ladies treated me in the store, he suggested I should not have purchased anything at all.  We would return, all dressed up, the next day with shopping bags, circa 1990.  “You guys work on commission right? Big mistake, huge.”  I don’t know what it is about a really attractive man quoting Pretty Woman, but damn that was hot. 

I found a local studio that has the class I have been curious to take.  It’s called barre. (I stole this next sentence off the website I cited a moment ago) “The barre method is influenced by classical ballet barre technique, Pilates, yoga, and orthopedic exercises.”  I took it Saturday and loved it.  Aside from the fact I need a LOT of work on my flexibility, upper arm strength and abs, I think I did pretty good for my first time.  I’ll return- as my abs are killing me right now. I’ve been told that’s a good thing- by people with stomach muscles.  I will note that I was happy to be acquainted with the instructor, Kristy.  She is sweet and friendly and attends the Catapult events.  She is all those qualities, that is, until she starts class. She turned into a drill instructor in about two seconds!  I’m not knocking her though, trust me, she makes you work your butt off, as you’re too scared to let her down!  🙂

After class I was feeling extra “health conscious” (and obviously I looked it with my new duds and “I totally just worked out” hair) and took a trip to the local health food store.  The staff was very friendly and helpful, alas, they could tell I was a rookie.  I guess I didn’t fool them.

It is expensive to be healthy! Total bill: $64 for the following ingredients: cacao powder, organic natural honey (this item the sales girl laughed at because how can honey NOT be organic?), raw ground almonds, raw unsweetened coconut flakes, Celtic sea salt and a Kombucha. Additionally, I picked up Delta 8 Products to Relieve Pain, to Relax or Just Get to Sleep.

I was having my brakes replaced, so I had my mother’s car for the morning.  I could either go home and wait for Brad to follow me to return the car, or I could make my mother smile by watching her choir practice- then make her take me home.  I decided to watch mom sing.  I was excited to see she took my advice and bought a new pair of jeans.  She looked great, actually.  And she informed me that a family friend, Cathy, advised her never to leave the house without a pair of “bling” on (mom went with a multi colored necklace).  So, she had bling, new jeans and a smile.  She’d never looked better to me.  When we got home, of course, I locked myself out.  Times like these I love NH (I lived on the 20th floor of a highrise in Chicago), as I left a window unlocked. Problem solved.Â

Getting back to my day of health, I decided to make these.  It’s a little expensive and messy, but worth it in the end.  Ingredients listed above, aside from the drink.

#organic.
#organic.

 You basically mix everything together, except for the coconut, getting your hands a wonderful shade of dark brown.  You put them into little balls (hehe) and then roll them into the coconut, covering them.  It suggests to put them in the freezer, but I think they were fine as they were.  You can do what you like.Â

End result:

brad liked them. success! :)
brad liked them. success! 🙂

 Cool thing about these truffles is that you look like you’re a gourmet cook, while you actually only need the skills of a 2 year old with play-doh.Â

So, I will give this healthy thing a try for a little while.  Who’s with me?  #healthyliving

Posted on

a little trick for an amazing treat.

I understand the title of this post would be better fit around October, but I was thinking about something this morning and it sparked my brain into motion: compartmentalizing.  What does that have to do with tricks and treats?  I’ll explain, ramble on a bit, and then I will provide a really good recipe.

I have always been a “the more the merrier” type of girl.  I am always the first to extend the invite to the quiet girl or boy in the back of the room to the party, as I truly believe that mixing different types of people could make for an interesting adventure- and that everyone deserves an invitation.   I’m not going to quote Rodney King, but you know what I am saying.

I have never had an issue combining high school, college, work colleagues and random friends I make along the way in the same room.  I had always thought this was the way everyone thought until a few years ago.  I learned that people are placed into “compartments” within ones mind of how they are associated.  Apparently, this idea of compartmentalizing is more common than I would have ever imagined.  How is that fun?  If you get along with each person in your “network,” then wouldn’t the people at least have one thing in common?  I’m not talking about forcing friendships, I just think it’s good to keep an open mind.  I asked one of my friends who practices this method and she  explained to me that “certain people know certain things, and others know other things. So, I keep them separate. It’s less messy.”  Side thought: her closet is much more organized than mine, so maybe she has a point.  Is it better to keep work at work and home at home? Who would come to the BBQ? Is it possible to be too friendly and open? What if people feel left out? 

seems more complicated than organized. lots of lives to keep straight!
seems more complicated than organized. lots of lives to keep straight!

The same thing could be said for baking that I said above:  Mixing fun and different things like cayenne pepper, butterscotch chips, peanut butter, or cinnamon into a brownie batter adds a little spice, texture or intrigue to what would normally be a typical boring baked good.  The beauty of my recipes is that I actually use box batter for the majority of my treats- I just doctor them so far from the original recipe that, aside from the powder, it isn’t at ALL what the box intended.  End result: seconds, thirds, and sadness when you realize they are all gone.

Okay, I got that out.  Now for the treat I promised.

Lately, Brad and Gunnar have been devouring my homemade ice cream sandwiches.  It’s simple, easy and quick.  Enjoy.

  • First, at your grocery store, purchase a bag of Betty Crocker Cookie Mix.  I like these.
  • The recipe calls for one egg and one stick of butter.  You could sub the butter with coconut oil, which is actually amazing for your body- and tastes great!  I bought some last night and I was not disappointed.
  • I always add 1-2 tsp of vanilla extra extra and 5-10 dashes of cinnamon for a little kick.
  • Put into 1″ balls about 2 inches apart on a lightly greased (with the coconut oil) baking sheet.  Bake for 11 minutes on 350′.  Remove from rack and let cool completely.
  • Pick your filler (gelato, sorbet, Ben & Jerry’s, etc).
  • After the cookies are cooled, scoop an appropriate portion of filler between two cookies. (to keep them neat, I always wrap each sandwich immediately in tin foil and put in freezer)
  • Wait.

    combination can be a fantastic thing
    “it’s quite nice to see that I didn’t have to change who I was to reach two very different types of people.”      -marc jacobs.

I’m going to bet that if my friend ate one of these bad boys she might agree that not all mixing is a bad thing.